Pros and cons of the holiday season
Published: Friday, December 10, 2010
Updated: Thursday, December 9, 2010 20:12
I decided that the Christmas "Sprinkle the Cheer" donut from Dunkin's just doesn't cut it. Though tasty, they use the same sprinkles as your Average-Joe vanilla and chocolate frosted donuts upon this supposed to be seasonal, fun, and festive donut. Unfortunately, I have no choice but to deduct creativity points, leaving the holiday classic with a mere slightly above average overall scoring.
No, to my dismay, this whole article is not about donuts. I originally would have liked it to be, but to spare those girls whom the thought of eating a mere munchkin is like, ‘the First Cardinal Sin of the South Beach diet,' I will instead talk about other festivities during the season of Christmas that may be off putting to some, just as the poser donut is for me. It seems that everything about Christmas has a pro and a con, to be looked at accordingly with your own personal opinion. I find that for every person that loves a certain classic Christmas tradition, another person hates that same tradition with a burning passion. I'll have to demonstrate through example:
Pro: Starting Thanksgiving day, it is officially "Love Actually" season, every girl's favorite Christmas movie and secretly every guy's (most guys I know pretend to think it's dumb and flick on "Braveheart" instead to secure their masculinity).
Con: Starting Thanksgiving day, it is officially "Love Actually" season. For those who are not in a relationship, thoughts of sticking their heads into a stove full of Christmas cookies occur especially while watching the scene, when Keira Knightley gets wooed silently in the snow with posters that display true love.
Pro: Christmas music starts playing nonstop on most radio stations.
Con: Dominic the Christmas Donkey doesn't come out at night for fear of being slaughtered by someone that has heard his anthem one too many times.
Pro: Gift giving and receiving.
Con: Spending your already limited funds and having to say "Oh, no Aunt Mary! Of course I still like Snow Globes," with the fakest smile you can muster. I personally once received a Bible from my priest uncle, which, by the way, I found not only superfluous but insulting.
Pro: Spending time with family.
Con: The fifth week home you're ready for a Gretchen Weiners' style cracking moment. This usually happens to me the 6th or 7th time my little sister places her life-size creepy Cinderella doll (aka my arch nemesis) in places like the bathtub or hung with a tie used as a noose upon my door.
Pro: New Years!
Con: New Years sucks. It can pose a constant pressure to do something cool enough for Facebook-worthy pictures complete with a "clever" album title, which takes your typical girl obsessed with her own image two days to think of. More often than not these said New Year's plans leave you at a house party with your head in the toilet while Dick Clark struggles to count backwards from 10 seeing as he is now 1,000.
Pro: The song "Christmas Shoes" is touching and makes you want to go home, give your mom a huge hug, and appreciate her presence in your life.
Con: The song "Christmas Shoes" makes you want to rush home in tears, squeeze your mom, and make sure she doesn't have cancer! Jesus was born, why are you depressing me random one hit wonder man?
Pro: Christmas specials on television.
Con: Christmas specials that involve unnecessary sequels such as "Home Alone 93: My Parents Still Forgot About Me at Christmas Time", and "The Santa Claus 40: It's Me Tim Allen Here, Still the Santa Claus Though I Peaked Sometime During Home Improvement".
Pro: Singing Christmas carols around the house.
Con: Listening to your mother lyrically butcher those Christmas carols aka "Later on we'll perspire/as we dream by the fire"- a somewhat disgusting image that she never bothered to change even after learning the correct lyrics of "Later on we'll conspire."
Pro: Having siblings that still believe in Santa Claus.
Con: Having to become Santa Claus until 5:30am with your parents and older brother - sans jolliness, reindeer, magical sleigh and prepared cookie platter. The Santa we learn of in childhood tales is a diva.
Pro: Holiday parties with Christmas sweaters, sparkly dresses, candy canes, and Christmas trees galore.
Con: That Christmas party will probably be broken up by our local police, who intend to save the Worcester community busting one college party at a time. Heroes, if you ask me.
Don't get me wrong, I'm no Scrooge. I start listening to Christmas music sometime in late October and I won't leave my house if the claymation of Rouldoph the Red Nosed Reindeer comes on ABC Family's 25 days of Christmas. However, I will absolutely turn off the song "Christmas Shoes" to void myself of depression and this year will be bringing in the New Year right for the first time in a long time with pots and pans, a big screen tv, and the comfort of being around the ones that matter most. And despite its slight disappointment, will be eating at least one "Sprinkle the Cheer" donut a day.